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by Roxanne Kennett Join Roxanne Kennett as she prepares for the big day next January when, amid lots of pink and chocolate cake, she’ll swap her little Miss for a glamorous Mrs.
When newly engaged you’re at your peak of relationship happiness. You’ve never been more in love or more excited about the future and your romantic frame of mind means arguments become a thing of your non-engaged past. Or at least, that’s the theory. But in our case, as I’m sure a lot of other couples have found, newly engaged status was directly responsible for a drastic increase in the amount of arguing we did. Which I guess stands to reason because where there’s a wedding, there are decisions to be made. And where there are decisions to be made there are inevitably going to be disagreements. Or screaming shouting matches, as they are more commonly known. For us, the first major argument came dishearteningly early on in our engagement. Two days after his proposal to be precise. I was high on excitement and giddily turned my attention to the first decision that needed to be made. ‘When?’ I just assumed, not unreasonably I feel, that you get engaged, plan the wedding and get married. Unfortunately for me, Dale holds a different view on the matter. And while I was imagining our big day as being merely months away, Dale saw it as a distant speck on our relationship horizon. Needless to say when I realised this I wasn’t best pleased and we’d barely unpacked our suitcase from Paris when the love nest quickly turned into a war zone.
Some brides may feel differently (although I doubt it), but I just don’t see the point of long engagements. Surely you get engaged to get married not to just, well, get engaged. And if someone doesn’t want to get married then they shouldn’t ask their significant other to marry them. But that’s just my opinion. And Dale's opinion was obviously different, hence the three day stand off that followed. He felt that we should enjoy our engagement before starting to worry about table plans and napkins – not that he’s the one worrying about such things anyway. But planning a wedding is stressful enough – who wants to drag that out for three or four years? No, to me it seemed obviously logical that as we got engaged in December 2005 the wedding should follow in 2006. Whereas I think Dale had the year 2010 circled on his internal calendar – not that he dared to utter it for fear of me going seriously high-pitched and never returning back to normal. In the end, being the mature, considerate couple that we are, we managed to reach a compromise. Immediately wiping from our relationship memory the three days of steely looks, hissy fits and emotional blackmail/bribery/reverse psychology it had taken to settle on some sort of shaky middle ground. Dale felt that 2006 didn’t leave us enough time to organise things/save up/persuade Alan Shearer to perform the ceremony at St James Park. So I agreed to move my self imposed 2006 deadline back to 2007 and hey presto, domestic bliss returned to our home once more. He’s happy because he gets a bit of breathing space before the big day and I’m the good fiancee who takes his feelings into account. So it’s settled and I cordially invite you all to our wedding day – in 2007 – on January 6th! Tee hee.
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